Advice: The confidence trick

Hey paali paali auntie! My problem is that I was in a relationship with a family friend a year and a half ago but he was only in Pakistan for six months and he had to go back to London. I fell in love with him truly, madly, deeply…and he left. We tried to do the long distance thing but it didn't work out…and it ended really badly and I was left really hurt while he moved on and got himself a new gori girlfriend. He moved on while I looked behind…and now I am going to London next month and we will be staying at his house for a week! And my feelings are still there, but I want to hate him, ignore him and just show him that I am OK. But I am so bad at hiding my emotions, please help me! I just want him to think that I am ok without him just like he's ok without me! Love Overemotional Larki Dear Jet-set, Ok, so you've got a month. Well I can't promise you that you'll get over him in that time but do, do some soul searching about why things between you two happened the way they did. When you think this way things will become clearer to you and you will avoid similar situations in future. Also if thinking about all this makes you emotional do have a good long cry. Get it out of your system. Now for the wicked bit, use this month to get into great shape (wink wink) and plan, as in really plan your trip to London. Be civil when you meet him and if your feelings show…well that's who you are. I am not sure what the scene with your parents is like, but it's London and you can be out of your ex's face the whole day and not think about him. Your plan should be to focus on London rather than the ex. Find things to do, work out where you will be everyday and make the most of your trip. Your week will fly by. Hi Auntie! I am 20, handsome, and a third year engineering student but my problem is that I have got a crush on my class fellow. I have loved her since we met in the first week of 1st year but I didn't know how to let her know about my immense love for her. She is also kind of reserved. And that is why I have not found a way to interact with her; however I have got many signs from her meaning she is also interested in me. Sometimes I am 100 per cent confident that she is also in love with me. Actually she belongs to a well reputed, religious family so I don't think she will ever say anything. But tell me, what should I do? I am unable to say anything to her. My studies are being badly affected by all this and I am unable to sleep at all. She has captured my mind, soul and heart. Please suggest some way as I don't want to lose my position in studies but I also don't want to lose her. Help me, my life is becoming meaningless. True lover! Hey Handsome, Take a long, hard look at yourself in the mirror — you're young, handsome (sigh) and educated…any girl would be lucky to have. Just believe it. Live with believing this about yourself for a few days and the feeling will come naturally to you. Your crush is a class fellow, so striking a conversation with her should not be hard. You can talk to her about anything, a teacher, a lesson or the food in the canteen that sucks. Perhaps you shouldn't try so hard to go out and have a romantic relationship with her. Focus instead on becoming her friend. That way you will get to know her better and be in a position to decide if a romantic relationship with her is really what you are after. This may sound unthinkable but you still don't know the girl well and might discover that you really don't like her as much as you did. Good luck. Hi, I saw the letter in your column from a 65-year-old retired officer and I have a suggestion for him. Not sure which part of Pakistan he lives in but if he can travel on his own, there are lots of options to do voluntary work in different organisations such as hospital tuck shops and book shops. In certain hospitals these places are run by a bunch of volunteers. I suggest to him to go and see if they can accommodate him as the Internet might not be the best alternative to a dose of fresh air and human interaction. Adios Anonymous Auntie will not reply privately to any query. Please send concise queries to auntieagni@gmail.com